I am a parent of a very active four year old kid. I do everything for my son but that doesn’t make me a good mother. I am very impatient, cranky and a huge loser when it comes to time management.
I know. I am trying.
Now that I am having a week long staycation with myself, I am into developing my own parenting mantra for this year to have a harmonious relationship with my son. I am on my way to become a better parent by first changing my attitude and outlook in life. I am temperamental and trying to get rid of it since I gave birth to Elijah because I know it will greatly affect my parenting style. I do not want to yell and lay my hands on him when I am mad but I cannot help it. I am in no way blaming him for being naughty because I know the problem is me.
Here are the Mantras I am going to live by to b an effective parent.
1.) Pause, Breathe and Think
If Elijah will do something wrong, I will try not to yell, instead, I’ll pause for a while, breathe and think if this is a scenario worth yelling at. I will try to be more calm and analyze the effect on my son if ever I scold him immediately to whatever he has done.
2.) Change is constant
Elijah enjoys messing around. He is not satisfied in playing LEGO alone. He wants to build LEGO, make clay, draw and watch YouTube all at the same time which irks me the most. I know that he is a kid and won’t be enjoying the toys he is playing with after several years. I will keep in mind that change is the only constant thing here on Earth. I will let him play whatever toy he wants as long as he will put it in the box afterwards.
3.) Stop saying NO
I do not want my son to miss his childhood by always stopping him. Our day always start with “Elijah, stop doing that!” and ends with “Elijah, do not touch that!”. I know he is tired of me being a nagger but I cannot help it and I am sorry. I will try not to stop him to whatever he wants to do. I will not force him to do things the way I want it. Live free. Worry less.
4.) We both need respect
I always told myself that I am his mother, therefore, I need to get a lot of respect from Elijah but did it ever occur to me that I also have to respect my son? The answer is NO. I am too focused on myself that I forgot to respect my own son. One good example is by the way I let him stop to play. When I say stop playing, he has to stop immediately. I do not care if he is on the verge of enjoying his toys. With my new parenting mantra, I will put a notice. I will ask him that play time is over in 30 minutes so that he knows.
These are the four mantras that I will try to live by for the succeeding months and I hope they work well with me. I will keep in mind that getting upset all the time won’t make anything better. This year, I will try to free myself from all the stress I am getting not from my son but from my own attitude.