We, mothers, have one thing in common and that is our unconditional love we have for our children. The way we raise them is unique from one parenting style to another. My siblings and I were raised by mom differently since we have different attitudes. Even if she has different strategies, we grow up just the way she wanted us to be. Happy and ready to have our own families.
I, as a mother, should determine what kind of parenting style to use for my son. I cannot use uninvolved and authoritarian parenting at the same time. It will only cause confusion to my son. I can use all the four parenting styles but NOT at the same time. I can be permissive in the first 5 years of my son’s life then authoritative for the next 10 to 15 years of his life and lastly uninvolved parenting for this phase of his life is that he’s already able to decide for himself and he knows what he wants in his life.
My strategy in raising my son is influenced by different factors. It is certainly influenced by how I was raised then the other factors came from the culture, time, values and beliefs that I have. I am raising my son in a totally different environment. We were in a very crowded and noisy environment, not much electronics gadgets so we play outside with our neighbors. Today, Elijah has his own iPad, can use our laptop, can have the access to the internet and cable channels. In this case, I cannot raise my son exactly just how I was raised. We live in different generations and if I have to raise Elijah just like before, he may end up disliking me. I may get some of the strategies my mom used which I think will be beneficial for raising my own son.
Our financial status may also greatly affect how we are going to raise our kids but whatever factor they may be, let us make sure that our kids will be ready to face life’s challenges when they are old enough to understand things.
22 Responses
I’m strict pero open ang communication namin.
It’s true that our parenting style is somehow based on how we are raised but in a different setting. I’m authoritarian at times but mostly, I spoil my daughter. I always give in to what she wants because it’s a miracle that we have her now.
I don’t have a set of rules because I just take things as they come. I may be authoritarian now and a spoiler in some days.
different factors din.. but basically my guide is how I was raised
I have two kids and sometimes I wonder if I am doing the right thing in raising them. It is scary because I hope that they will grow up to be God fearing and responsible people. I can be stern at times, and I also let them know that I am also their mother, and a friend. They might still be young to understand, but it is never too early to discipline kids. I grew up also with no electronics, no access to internet (didn’t even know what internet was), no video games and all I had was one doll that my mom made all my doll dresses and someone stole it. 🙁 Right now, my first one knows how to use the computer, but I teach him limitations. He also likes to spend time outside, play in the yard, at the park and be with other kids, which I think is a good thing. Parenting is sure one huge responsibility, and I believe that if we want our kids to act the right way, we have to be models to our kids as well. It is from us where they learn a lot of things because home is their first school and parents are their first teachers. 🙂
I am not a mother yet but if i’ll ever be, I am afraid i can’t help to be authoritative when needed. I grew up fearing my mother for his being a totally authoritative mother but i did thank her for that. Kids nowadays though are quite hard to handle with the present of modern technology.
I’m not yet a mommy but if ever maging mommy ako, siguro I’ll be less strict like my mom. Cause I don’t want my son/daughter to be afraid of me. Gusto ko maging open sya sakin.
Parenting for me is a process. Personally I didn’t set any plan on how I should raise my girls. Like everything is spontaneous. All I really wanted is to be friends and to get as close with them specially that they’re both girls. We get along just right and I encourage them to speak up their minds all the time.
dropping in from HH!
Parents learn the best way to raise their children as they go along. Your thoughts though about parenting styles are very useful.
you hit some good parenting skills here…thanks for sharing!
I am raising my daughter the way my parents raised me. Maybe not physically and mentally because of the internet, technology and all, but I am instilling her the same values my parents had taught me.
I understand that parents vary in styles in rearing up their kids. I really admire parents who are tactfully firm in the character formation of their kids. It makes me uncomfortable if I saw a toddler giving a face at his or her parents when his wants is not given. Tantrums should not be tolerated. Kids are different these days. They are more wiser and observant so if they have their own way any time of the day, then parents must be careful – they can be manipulated any time, too.
I believe my parenting style is influenced more on how I was being raised by my parents, the values and being God-fearing is so much present. But with a twist to also apply and consider the generation they are in right now.
a playmate, friend and of course a mom to my kid.. i think my parenting style is the modern one ‘coz i never encountered this with my parent..
I used different parenting style to my son I defend it on the situation. Sometimes I am strict sometimes I am giving.. but I will always try to talk to him when we are in bed…
most of the time the way we parent our child(ren) is influenced by how we were brought up as kids by our parents. If we have a “not” so good childhood experience this can have an impact to the way we raise our kids, some may take it in a positive way while other take it negatively. But either way our main goal is to give our kids a better life, love and care.
As parents, we have to be firm. Firm in setting what discipline we will implement in the household.
Marms
Raising my kids without the help of other people is the best thing I could do for them. THat’s one reason why I set aside my career for a while in order to focus my attention to them. IT’s very important especially here because the culture is very different that what we have in Pinas.
I think my parenting style is a mix of traditional and modern ways. It’s definitely different with how I was raised because my older siblings basically did have of the parenting. I want my kid to be open to me so I’m not that strict though between me and hubby, I’m more of the disciplinarian.
I guess my parenting style is a lot different from the one I was raised. I was raised more conservatively and old school. I’m more adaptive and in touch with my daughter… not too strict and more open to talks.
Sometimes I’m strict, sometimes I’m lenient; it really depends on the situation, and you’re right, kids these days are so different, so we cannot really apply the parenting styles of our parents.